Never Say “I Hate My Natural Hair” Again

Three Reasons You Hate Your Natural Hair

I’ve been watching a lot of your YouTube videos lately, and it’s heartbreaking to see that so many of you are struggling with your natural hair.

I know your natural hair is awesome, and I want you to know it too.

So here are three reasons you might hate your natural hair and how to fix them.

And if you’re not feeling so hot about your natural hair right now, leave us a comment and tell us why.


#1 You’re doing the most

I know what it’s like coming from easy breezy straight hair to hair like mine.

It’s a huge adjustment, and it’s a big shock.

I also know what it’s like when you first big chop and you’re bombarded with information.

Ya gotta pre-poo, buy a Denman, learn how to do a clay mask, get all new natural products, learn how to retwist…

It’s overwhelming.

The fix? Stop doing so much. Simplify your routine.

Keep your natural hair routine simple

Condition your hair and arms together #lifehack

It takes time to learn your natural hair, especially if you’ve never dealt with it before.

So do yourself a favor and start with the basics: Wash it, condition it, and keep it moisturized.

Boom. That’s it.

Now down the line, you might find that you need more. The ACV rinses, shingling, deep conditioning…all that can wait.

For now, keep it sweet and simple.


#2 You can’t do anything with it

I just watched a video of a woman with natural hair, and she was so frustrated because… and I quote…

“I hate my natural hair. I can’t do anything with this *bleep!*”

I laughed so hard. I shouldn’t have, but I wasn’t laughing at her. I was laughing with her.

Because man, I’ve been there.

We’ve all been there. Learning to style your natural hair can be like learning to do your hair all over again.

It’s almost like you’ve never touched your hair before and, in a way, you haven’t.

Black woman with natural hair afro.

Know that you are not alone.

For every natural hair tutorial you see on YouTube, there are 20 more like me in the cut who don’t know how to do diddly-squat with their natural hair.

But it’s cool. All you gotta do is learn one style.

Master just one quick and easy style.

My favorite? Twists. Easy to do, you don’t need super long hair, and you can rock them for days.

twists nappy headed black girl

On top of that, you can even wash your hair with them still in.

If twists don’t work for you, OK. Find a style that does and rock it ’till the wheels fall off.

If you can’t do anything with your natural hair yet, don’t worry. Go to someone who can.

These folks on YouTube will have you thinking that you should be able to do everything for your natural hair yourself.

And maybe one day you will be able to. But until then, get some help.

If you need to visit the salon until you’re comfortable on your own, go.

Stylists are not the devil. The end goal is healthy natural hair, so do what you gotta do to get yours.


#3 Unrealistic expectations (a.k.a. you played yourself)

Lauryn Hill afro

Killing me softly with her fro

Before I big chopped I had dreams of growing my hair out big and nappy and having a Lauryn Hill fro.

Like an Angela Davis-type fro where people sitting behind me would complain because they couldn’t see.

But, surprise surprise, my hair is not about that life.

I don’t have thick hair. I’ll never have thick hair. It’s not in my genes. And that’s OK.

I think many of us have hair idols when we first big chop. That’s normal.

You know, some uber famous YouTuber or celebrity or even a friend who has what you consider perfect natural hair.

And it can be devastating to realize that your hair looks nothing like that.

This is a story as old as time. Here you are hoping for her like Solange, but it turns out you have hair like Yara Shahidi.

Solange and Yara Shahidi

Solange and Yara. Both natural. Both beautiful.

But this is a great problem to have because the fix is simple: Love your hair.

Easier said than done? Maybe. But I think confidence has a lot to do with it.

(Read this post and build confidence with your natural hair.)

Also, I can’t stress this enough: Surround yourself with people who appreciate natural hair.

Your environment has so much to do with how you see yourself and how you love yourself.

If you don’t have people in your life who support your natural hair journey, then make it a point to find some who do.

Appreciate and be grateful for your hair because it’s beautiful. Love your hair, and it’ll love you back.


Watch 3 Reasons You Hate Your Natural Hair on YouTube


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